Getting Through The Tough Times In Your Relationship
By Mark Webb
Every marriage will go through times of challenge. Some marriages will be
strengthened while others will be destroyed. Tough times may be as common as
financial problems or the aftermath of a hurtful argument. Marriages may
suffer as the result of a miscarriage or the death of a loved one. Whatever
challenge you face, remember this:
It is better to be prepared for tough times and not have them, than to have
tough times and not be prepared.
Here are five of the essential principles to strengthen your relationship and
give you an edge during times of adversity.
- Be Mindful Not To Worry. If something needs to be fixed, fix it if you can
but remember that worry never fixes anything. Worrying is a waste of time and
energy. It's like sitting in a rocking chair, it gives you something to do but
it gets you nowhere. Worry prevents you from seeing hope and solutions.
Besides, most things we worry about never happen.
-
Be Patient Towards Your Partner. Patience is an excellent remedy for the
tough times you will go through. You love your partner so don't choose the
moments of crisis to come down on them. Don't let stress sway you into losing
perspective. Realize that if you are not careful, adversity can damage your
relationship. Stay away from blaming, using criticism to make a point,
lecturing, sarcasm and name calling. Everything becomes possible again when
love and patience are present.
- Practice Forgiveness...It is amazing how quickly someone will turn on the
person they love. Don't let upset feelings infect your relationship.
Resentments close the door on the possibility of a bright future. Love is a
continous act of forgiveness. Everybody likes the idea of forgiveness until
they have to be the one to forgive. If you
want your relationship to be better than most, you must instill this habit of
forgiveness.
- Use Your Sense Of Humor. A laughing couple is much stronger than an
arguing or withdrawn couple. If you can find humor in the challenge you are
facing you can survive it. Laughter dissapates hopelessness. You cannot argue
and laugh at the same time. It is impossible. The choice is up to you.
- Vow To Stay Connected. Stand together against adversity. Promise to endure
throughout the storms that most likely will come your way at some point or
another. Staying connected takes practice. People commonly choose to withdraw
from each other at times of trouble. This distance may feel safer but it does
long term damage to the relationship. If you truly love your partner then vow
"We will get through this, Together!"
You are the only one who is responsible for your character. Do not let other
people or circumstances determine your actions. If there is goodness in your
relationship, then it is worth fighting for. Give your partner a message of
committed reassurance. Let them know, "I'm Here For You." and "We Will Get
Through This."
Things To Keep In Mind During The Tough Times:
Don't blame each other for the situation.
Lower your expectations of one another until the crisis subsides.
Eat leftovers or fastfood. Don't worry too much about the housework.
Remind yourself that the tough times won't last forever.
Don't take advice from people who have a negative attitude.
Ask for help from family and friends.
Remember your love and commitment to each other.
It's okay to let the answering machine take your calls.
Reduce your stress by exercising and getting plenty of sleep.
Best of wishes,
Mark Webb
Mark Webb is the author of How To Be A Great Partner and founder of Partner Focused Relationships™. Sign up for Mark Webb’s “Relationship Strategies” Ezine ($100 Value). Just visit his website at http://www.powerfulrelationshipadvice.com or http://www.therelationshipspecialist.com
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